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I’m a 25-year-old woman who was close to my 55-year-old dad until he started dating Taylor, who’s 30. At the time, I had just graduated from college and was living with him.
I was shocked by their relationship because of the age gap and the fact that Taylor was his employee. My dad planned for Taylor to move in and work permanently at his company.
I was worried about the power dynamic and asked about Taylor’s family. My dad said Taylor’s dad had abandoned them. Despite my concerns, I tried to be friendly.
Taylor soon began avoiding me and said I was unfriendly for wearing AirPods around the house and not talking to them enough. I apologized and tried to be more sociable, even though I’m an introvert.
Later, Taylor complained that I was ungrateful, especially when I cried because my dad and Taylor went grocery shopping without me. I felt lonely due to quarantine restrictions and had only my dad for company.
Over time, Taylor found more reasons for me to apologize. I eventually moved out because I was unhappy. My dad and I went to therapy, and I tried to resolve things with Taylor through letters, but the conflict dragged on. Taylor even said I couldn’t visit my childhood home, even when they weren’t there. My dad agreed, which upset him greatly.
When our therapist suggested my dad stand up for himself, he kept saying, “We can work it out,” but only asked me to apologize. I had already apologized many times and couldn’t keep doing it.
My dad admitted he always had to apologize in their relationship. They’re still together, and I’m still banned from the house.
Now I live far away and am getting married. I invited my dad, and he asked if Taylor would come. I said that my wedding wasn’t the place to suddenly start talking to me again. My dad wasn’t upset, but I felt bad. Am I wrong?
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I’m a 25-year-old woman who used to be close with my 55-year-old dad. Things changed when he started dating Taylor, 30, who was his employee. My dad planned for Taylor to move in and work at his company. I was concerned about their age gap and the power dynamic.
Taylor began avoiding me and said I was unfriendly. Despite my efforts to be more sociable, Taylor found more reasons to complain. I eventually moved out because I was unhappy.
My dad and I tried therapy, but the conflict continued, and Taylor even banned me from visiting my childhood home.
Now, I live far away and am getting married. I invited my dad but told him my wedding wasn’t the place to reconcile with Taylor. My dad wasn’t upset, but I feel bad. Am I wrong?
Let’s swiftly assess a handful of the top comments: Am I Wrong for Excluding My Dad Partner from My Wedding?
NTA.
I understand why you wouldn’t want her there.
It’s your wedding and you decide on the guest list.
Is your mom’s still alive?
NTA. Taylor sounds manipulative and your dad is going through a midlife crisis like a puppy dog drooling at food. Don’t’ invite her. She’d just make issues.
Most importantly, DON’T APOLOGIZE!
Im sure he knows I would never want her there.. unfortunately he doesn’t seem able to care about what I want, and I’m sure Taylor told him she wanted to be there so that’s the most important thing. I doubt she would have gone if I initially invited her, she just saw the opportunity to complain that I had excluded her
Inevitable-Place9950 writes:
NTA! Rarely do I think it’s a good idea to exclude a life partner, but when that person has blamed you for so many things and then banned you from your family home, it’s entirely appropriate to exclude them.
NTA but everyone repeatedly using she/her for Taylor in the comments is just rude. You can think someone is an asshole and still use their pronouns it’s not a privilege that can be taken away.
