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AITA by Telling My Best Friend to Toughen Up? A 29-year-old woman and her 34-year-old best friend are facing a tough moment in their relationship. The younger woman has always been there for her friend, who frequently complains about her life.
But the younger woman’s patience snaps when her friend grumbles about visiting her sister-in-law, whom she doesn’t like. Already having a rough day, the 29-year-old tells her friend to just leave if she’s not happy.
The next day, things take a serious turn. The 29-year-old gets into a bad car accident, injuring herself and her boyfriend and wrecking their car. When her friend checks in, the 29-year-old mentions she doesn’t like hospitals.
Her friend responds with the same “just leave then” attitude, which makes the 29-year-old furious. She points out how different it is to leave a hospital without a ride compared to leaving a social event.
The argument heats up as the 29-year-old calls out her friend’s lack of empathy, telling her to “get over herself.” The friend tries to guilt-trip her for overreacting, which only makes things worse.
In the end, the 29-year-old’s frustration is understandable, but her reaction might seem too harsh. The friend’s repeated insensitivity, especially during a tough time, also fuels the conflict. Both sides have valid feelings, but they need to communicate better and show more understanding to fix their friendship.
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AITA by Telling My Best Friend to Toughen Up?
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A 29-year-old woman and her 34-year-old best friend are experiencing a rough patch in their relationship. The younger woman has been a supportive friend. She listens patiently to her friend’s constant complaints.
However, the younger woman’s patience wears thin. Her friend is upset about visiting her sister-in-law, whom she dislikes.
The 29-year-old, having a difficult day herself, tells her friend to just leave if she’s unhappy. Things take a turn for the worse the next day. The 29-year-old is in a serious car accident.
She and her boyfriend are injured, and their car is totaled. When the friend checks on them, the 29-year-old mentions her discomfort with hospitals.
The friend responds with the same “just leave then” comment. This response angers the 29-year-old. She points out that leaving a hospital without transportation is very different from leaving a social event voluntarily.
The argument escalates. The 29-year-old accuses her friend of lacking empathy. She tells her friend to “get over herself.” The friend then tries to guilt-trip her for overreacting. This attempt only deepens the conflict.
In summary, the 29-year-old’s frustration is understandable but her response might seem harsh. The friend’s repeated insensitivity, especially during a crisis, adds to the tension. Both individuals have valid reasons for their feelings. They need to communicate better and show more empathy to resolve their issues.
Let’s swiftly assess a handful of the top comments: AITA by Telling My Best Friend to Toughen Up?
NTA. Your best friend’s behavior is toxic. It sounds like she gaslights you a lot. My partner is going through a similar situation like this with her best friend. However, she’s about to end the friendship and I support her 100%. I’m not saying you should end the friendship but maybe you need to take a break from it. Maybe taking a break will give you clarity on whether you should continue or not.
NTA – First of all: I hope you and your boyfriend are doing better and are recovering well.
With that out of the way: You have been a good friend for her and let her vent. ‘Just leave then’ is not even a toxic comment in the situation she was in. If your friend was as uncomfortable as she said she was, telling her to leave would be good advice.
But the first opportunity (in which you are actually physically hurt) and you need your friend, she responds so toxic and makes it about her own hurt ego. You were justified in telling her to get over herself.
NTA. I can understand being hurt over your “just leave” (though she sounds absolutely exhausting), but what she did was unacceptable. There’s a time and place to bring up petty drama, and that’s not when you just got out of the hospital and your BF is still in there. I think you have every right to distance yourself from this very selfish person.
NTA. This woman is NOT your friend – she’s an emotional Chupacabra, sucking out your life force and offering nothing in return but passive aggressive bullshit. Time you gave yourself permission to cut her loose.
Hope you and your boyfriend are on the mend soon!
NTA – I had a best friend like that once. I loved her, but she was toxic and I had to cut ties with her. She was sucking the life and joy out of me. Does she treat her other friends like this, or just you?
