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AITA for eating with my hands causing my girlfriend to leave in embarrassment? My boyfriend L (20M) and I (20F) have been together for 7 months. We usually grab takeout, but to celebrate my promotion, we decided to dine at a high-end Italian restaurant with a strict dress code.
L isn’t exactly a neat eater, which I’ve learned to handle, but I was unprepared for how his table manners would unfold during this dinner. When our appetizer, a beautifully arranged bruschetta, arrived, L joked about eating it as if we were at home. I reminded him that this was a fancy place with other patrons around.
Instead of using the fork provided, L dug into the bruschetta with his hands, getting sauce everywhere. I tried to overlook it, but things deteriorated further when the pasta came.
He dropped his fork and started scooping up chicken and noodles with his fingers, making a mess with the sauce. It got all over the tablecloth, his clothes, and himself. After finishing, he loudly burped, causing the table next to us to look on in shock. The waiter even asked if L was okay, and other diners were staring. To make matters worse, L propped his feet up on the chair next to us, blocking the aisle.
I didn’t want to escalate the situation, so I paid the bill and left, feeling deeply embarrassed. On the drive home, I expressed my mortification to L, but he accused me of not letting him enjoy his meal as he wished. He argued that as paying customers, we should be free from judgment.
AITA?
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AITA for eating with my hands causing my girlfriend to leave in embarrassment?
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After dating for 7 months, my boyfriend L (20M) and I (20F) decided to celebrate my promotion with a special dinner at a high-end Italian restaurant that had a strict dress code. We usually stick to takeout, so this was a big step up for us.
L isn’t the neatest eater, but I’ve managed until now. However, I was caught off guard by his lack of table manners during this dinner. When our first appetizer, a beautifully plated bruschetta, arrived, L jokingly asked if he could eat it like he was at home. I reminded him we were at a fancy restaurant with other diners around.
Instead of using the serving fork, L dug into the bruschetta with his hands, splattering sauce everywhere. I tried to overlook it, but things got worse with the pasta. When it arrived, he dropped his fork and began picking up chicken and noodles with his fingers, making a mess with the sauce that got all over the tablecloth, his clothes, and himself. After finishing, he loudly burped, causing the table next to us to stare in shock. The waiter even checked if L was okay, and other diners were watching. To make matters worse, L propped his feet up on the chair next to us, blocking the aisle.
Hoping to avoid further embarrassment, I paid the bill and left. On the drive home, I expressed how mortified I was, but L accused me of not letting him enjoy his meal. He argued that as paying customers, we shouldn’t be judged by others.
AITA?
Let’s catch up on the top Comments on the Reddit Posts: AITA for eating with my hands causing my girlfriend to leave in embarrassment?
sa83705 Writes:
Nope. I wouldn’t compare him to the lofty realm of a toddler. My toddlers were taught manners, didn’t purposefully humiliate me in public, and tried to use the utensils all the time (maybe not the right ones but they sure tried). Pretty sure my dog doesn’t even make that kind of a mess. Time to toss this fish back into the ocean.
Ermithecow Writes:
My ex set the table on fire in a restaurant, then yelled at me for pouring water on it because “people are looking.”
I mean, yes dipshit, they’re looking because you dipped your napkin into the candle flame and then into a glass of brandy, not because I put out your actual fire. Obviously things only got worse and I should have left him at that point, so absolutely can confirm this kind of shit is deliberate and will likely escalate.
My 2 year old had 3 slices of pizza tonight, in a white shirt. He only got sauce on his face and hands. I’d say this guy doesn’t even have the maturity level of a 2 year old, never mind 5.
Marzipan-Shepherdess Writes:
EXCELLENT point! It dovetails with his maturity level…which I’d place at about 5 years old, tops.
OP, dump this jerk. He gets a kick out of upsetting you and making a fool of himself. Do you really want to waste any more time with someone who goes out of his way to act like that?
This here op.
A man who enjoys humiliating you, is going to escalate in abusing you. And quickly, too.
He just told you who is he. Dump him and bail, like any sane person would.
Edit:
Book suggestion, this is a pdf you can read on your phone or computer. It gets into the “why” of how this situation is concerning, and why I’m concerned for op.
