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AITA for Cutting My Niece College Fund Over Her BF? The bullying took place when my son, Shaun, was just 13. While some might view it as a distant memory and dismiss it as typical childhood behavior, what Shaun endured was far beyond mere teasing.
It started with hurtful names and slurs (Shaun is gay) and quickly escalated to cyberbullying and physical violence. The worst incident involved a group of kids brutally attacking Shaun, leaving him with a battered, bloody face. Despite my efforts to hold them accountable, they were simply brushed off as “kids playing too rough.
Shaun was so traumatized that he refused to go to school for nearly four months, and during that time, he nearly ended his own life. Thankfully, my wife intervened just in time. With the help of comprehensive mental health support, Shaun is recovering and doing much better now. We relocated to give him and our other children a fresh start.
I’m sharing this to clarify that it wasn’t just “kids being kids” it was serious and harmful bullying.
I’ve always been willing to support my family, including promising to cover my niece’s college expenses. However, during a recent Fourth of July visit to our hometown, my niece brought someone I never expected to see again Derek, one of the bullies.
I immediately recognized Derek, and it was clear he recognized me too because he quickly made his exit. I confronted my niece, questioning why she would bring him given his past actions. She brushed it off, claiming Derek had changed and that it was all ancient history.
Despite my sister’s insistence that my niece shouldn’t have invited Derek, my niece argued she had every right to bring her boyfriend and that if Shaun hadn’t moved on, it wasn’t Derek’s fault. My wife, outraged, called her heartless before leaving with the kids.
I stayed behind and told my niece that if Derek had truly changed, then he could cover her college expenses because I would no longer support it. Then I walked away.
Now, my family and I are staying in a nice hotel and planning to visit an amusement park.
I’ve been receiving calls and messages from my sister, brother-in-law, and others, insisting that I’m overreacting and should not punish my niece by denying her education. They believe Derek has changed and that I shouldn’t hold his past behavior against him forever.
Aita?
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AITA for Cutting My Niece College Fund Over Her BF?
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Stupidrice Writes:
I was bullied as young as 4 AND it still affects me. My last bullying was when I was 14-15 and I’ve still not forgiven the person. It hurt me so much and this wasn’t even physical.
The psychological effect is damaging. I still shy away from people as an adult. His niece should pay for her education.
Good on you and your whole family for putting your son’s wellbeing first. I’m the mom of a gay kid and I couldn’t be more proud, tell your son that he has lots of allies online.
Yep my son went through the same thing – ASD and ADD but the sweetest lad you could ever wish for. When he was 14 his classmates set up a homework WhatsApp group but it was really just to mock him and his group of quirky friends but were all too stupid to notice when someone joined the online group under a fake name (my son is extremely computer savvy). To say he was devastated is an understatement. All I can say is lockdown was in his eyes blissful.
