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A 32-year-old man has been dating his girlfriend, Jenny, 27, for almost a year. They have met each other’s families, and things seemed to be going well. Jenny is an only child from an Asian family. The man is half-Asian, half-white, and has a younger sister, Anna, who is 21. He and Anna are very close because their parents had demanding jobs, so he often took care of her.
Recently, the man noticed that Jenny often jokes about Anna being spoiled. She calls Anna a “princess.” Last week, during a family dinner, Jenny asked Anna many personal questions about her school and dating life.
Anna shared a story about a bad first date. Jenny laughed and said Anna needed to lower her standards because not every man would treat her like her brother does. This upset the man, but he didn’t want to embarrass Jenny in front of everyone.
Jenny then said that men see her as “high value” and that she would never have such a bad date. This annoyed the man. He told Jenny she was giving him “the ick” and to stop talking to his sister that way.
At home, they had a big argument. Jenny accused the man of overreacting and said he would be a terrible father because he always favors his sister. The man was shocked and still thinks he wasn’t wrong. He is seeking another opinion on the situation.
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Let’s swiftly assess a handful of the top comments: AITAH for Telling My Girlfriend She Made Me Uncomfortable at a Family Dinner?
Anna didn’t like that she was expected to foot the entire bill, not just her portion. We have no idea who asked who out or how culture plays into expectations (that can be discussed, of course, but doesn’t make him the A H). Plus, that’s a different conversation than the one he’s asking about. His girlfriend absolutely deserved what he said for how she put down his sister. There’s no E S H to that. He’s NTA.
it seems like her own “princess status” is threatened by your caring and close sibling relationship, so she is resorting to setting up a competition between her and your sister in order to punch-down on your sister to elevate her sense of ‘value’. Your gf is immature and not a nice person.
Any girl that refers to herself as ‘high value’ in a conversation is an ick. Doing it while letting your younger sibling know it’s because they aren’t ’high value’ is just cruel.
And by the way – no one of real class or substance would ever think that. She’s about as valuable as the gum on the bottom of a shoe!
Look at the people you truly admire in life. They don’t usually go around telling others they’re winner and that other people aren’t. They’re worth admiring for their actions and words. She doesn’t appear to have done anything that makes her someone of value.
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