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AITA for Standing Firm on My Daughter Hair Length for a Wedding? My sister-in-law (SIL) is getting married soon, and my in-laws are paying for the wedding. Because of this, my mother-in-law (MIL) is trying to control everything. When my husband Seb and I got married, we didn’t take their money to avoid their interference.
My three daughters, ages 12, 9, and 6, are in the wedding. They all have very long hair, which MIL hates. She wants their hair cut to shoulder length for the wedding. We’ve said no because the girls love their long hair.
MIL is threatening to kick them out of the wedding if we don’t agree. SIL is telling the family we’re ruining her wedding over a “hair trim.” MIL even sent a harsh message to my 12-year-old, blaming me and calling me controlling.
Seb has now said we won’t attend the wedding because of this. SIL is upset and complaining online, and we’re going low contact to protect our kids.
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AITA for Standing Firm on My Daughter Hair Length for a Wedding?
My sister-in-law (SIL) is getting married soon, and my in-laws are paying for everything. Because of this, my mother-in-law (MIL) is trying to control every detail. When my husband Seb and I got married, we didn’t take their money to avoid their interference.
My three daughters, ages 12, 9, and 6, are in the wedding. They all have long hair, which MIL hates. She wants them to cut their hair to shoulder length, but the girls love their long hair and don’t want it cut.
MIL is threatening to kick them out of the wedding if we don’t agree. SIL is saying we’re ruining her wedding over a “hair trim.” MIL even sent a nasty message to my 12-year-old, blaming me.
Seb and I have decided not to go to the wedding. SIL is upset and complaining online, and we’re going to low contact to protect our kids.
So, AITA for refusing to cut my daughters’ hair?
Let’s swiftly assess a handful of the top comments: AITA for Standing Firm on My Daughter Hair Length for a Wedding?
NTA and she needs to be blocked on your kids devices until she can show she’s improved her poor impulse control. No one gets to make those decisions but you and your kids. Jeeze is she jeal0us?
ElevatorOk8601 writes:NTA.
They like their hair long, and it’s their hair. If MIL and SIL can’t deal with it, that’s their problem not yours.
Tell your kids that their feelings and choices about their own body matter more than the opinion of others and that it is MIL, not you, preventing them from being in the wedding.
TimTam_the_Enchanter writes:NTA. Please keep your kids away from this woman. She will cut their hair behind your back given even half a chance, and suddenly it will be ‘just hair, not worth making a fuss over’ when you react, conveniently forgetting all the fuss she made already.
I am not even kidding here. It’s happened before to people on here. Your MIL reads like the type to go “well, let’s at least pull it back out of the way in a ponytail” and then cut the ponytail off, and expect them to just roll with it now that they look her idea of acceptable.
NiorNightingale writes:We will be having a talk with her about it. We have started talking to her more about the words people use to try and manipulate her, so that she can spot it for herself.
nccm16 writes:NTA
By letting someone who isn’t their parent/guardian control their appearance, you would be infringing on their sense of bodily autonomy which may have a lasting impact in their lives as MIL sounds like the type of person that will keep pressuring them to do what she wants. Good on you for respecting your daughters wishes. Also LC is a good choice, I would also block all of their numbers on your daughters phone.
