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My wife is six months pregnant and has expressed a strong wish to name our son after her late grandfather, John, who sadly passed away from cancer last September. She had a deep, meaningful relationship with him, and I completely understand her desire to honor his memory in this way.
Despite my respect for her grandfather and the closeness they shared, I have serious reservations about naming our son John, even as a middle name. My concern is that having the name “John Doe” could lead to significant issues for him later in life, especially in professional settings. The name “John Doe” is so commonly used as a placeholder for an unidentified person that it might undermine his credibility and make it harder for him to be taken seriously when applying for jobs or pursuing other opportunities.
My wife feels that I am being unreasonable and dismissive of a name that holds profound family significance. She believes I am overstating the potential problems that might arise from such a common name. Am I wrong for insisting on avoiding the name John, or am I justified in my concerns?
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AITA for not wanting my son to literally be named John Doe?
In this situation, a man named Doe is facing a naming dilemma for his future son. His wife, who is six months pregnant, wishes to name their child after her late grandfather, John, who passed away from cancer in September.
While the man has a deep respect for his wife’s grandfather and acknowledges the strong family connection, he is firmly opposed to using the name John, even as a middle name. He believes that naming their son John Doe would cause significant problems, particularly in professional settings, due to the common nature of the name and the potential for misunderstandings.
The man’s wife feels that his concerns are exaggerated and that he is being unreasonable by vetoing a name with sentimental value. This has led to tension between them, with his wife viewing his stance as dismissive of the emotional significance attached to the name.
Let’s Quick Catch Up: AITA for not wanting my son to literally be named John Doe?
This is actually used interchangeably with “Jane Doe” for the female version of “John Doe”, so also not a good choice.
As someone who had worked in a call center I can confirm that these kinds of names are treated with the utmost scrutiny. Very often junior operators are hazed by having them make prank calls like: “can you call <insert number of theme park> and ask for B B Wolf (big bad wolf)” and in this case: “call <insert number of any public service> and ask for J. Doe”. Naming anyone such a common prank name is asking for problems. I would like to hear though how public service operators treat these kinds of calls…
No bullshit, I knew a kid named Ben Dover in grade school. Every year or anytime we had a sub, the teachers gave him shit. “That can’t be your real name” or “I won’t tolerate this disrespect” etc. By middle school he started going by Benjamin even though his legal name was Ben to try and alleviate the issue.
People who give their kids “jokey” names or who put no thought into potential issues a name will cause really grind my gears. Good on OP for doing the right thing.
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