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AITA for Asking My Wife to Stop Using Outside Help? When a husband found out his wife had been secretly hiring help for household chores and childcare, he felt upset and confused. He questioned the role of a stay-at-home mom who brings in outside help and worried about how this would affect their family.
Feeling conflicted, he sought advice anonymously and debated whether to confront his wife. As he learned more about the extent of the hiring, including tasks beyond basic chores, his concerns grew about how often they were using outside help and its impact on their family.
After getting feedback that suggested he rethink his stance, the husband realized he might have misunderstood the situation and appreciated the pressure his wife might be under. He chose to approach her openly.
During their honest conversation, he apologized for his initial reaction and recognized her need for support. They came to a compromise: he would take time off work for a “stay-cation” to help with chores and the kids, while they adjusted their budget to cut back on hired help.
In the end, they found a solution that balanced their responsibilities and respected each other’s needs. This experience showed the importance of open communication and working together in their marriage.
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AITA for Asking My Wife to Stop Using Outside Help?
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When a husband discovered his wife had been secretly hiring help for household chores and childcare, he was initially upset and confused.
Concerned about the impact on their family, he sought advice and debated confronting her.
After receiving feedback, he realized he might have misunderstood and decided to talk to her directly.
They had an honest discussion where he apologized and acknowledged her need for support.
They agreed on a compromise: he would take time off work to help at home, and they would reduce the frequency of outside help.
This resolution balanced their responsibilities and highlighted the importance of open communication and mutual support in their marriage.
Let’s swiftly assess a handful of the top comments: AITA for Asking My Wife to Stop Using Outside Help?
Yta, “she doesn’t have anything to do all day” except take care of the kids and house. Get the school agers off to school, run errands, grocery shop, meal plan, clean, cook, book appointments, plan around the kids schedules. So what if she hires someone to helpnout once in awhile to get a break?
She obviously can’t be hiring someone fulltime for only $500/month.
NTA. She absolutely shouldn’t have sent behind your back and you have every right to have a conversation with her about it. It is wild to me that she has someone in daily. What exactly does she do all day if she has outsourced all this work? And her lying about the handcrafted blanket too, crazy.
So you think she does nothing? Send her on vacation… by herself. Anybody want to bet how many days he can do before he craters?? I think 3 days. You get the kids, the schedule the housework (never ending) grocery shopping, cooking and clean up. Make sure homework is done. By yourself no calling family in to take them cause you really need to get some sleep.
Edit:
ESH
If you can afford hiring help for your kids, it should be encouraged to help reduce the stress of raising 3 kids.
However, not telling you about hiring people is a crazy breach of trust. It’s also your home and children. You should have a say in who enters your house and who helps raise your kids.
Yta.
You go to your job Monday to Friday, you come home and leave your work at work.
A stay at home parent is on duty 24 hours a day. You do her job for a week and see if you don’t want some time off.
She should have talked about bringing in help or what help she needs if overwhelmed at times.
